Mindset, Rebirth Gervase Kolmos Mindset, Rebirth Gervase Kolmos

Meet The Modern Phoenix

Welcome to the Modern Phoenix Podcast! Born from the ashes of the “It’s All Me” podcast, The Modern Phoenix is here to guide, inspire, and empower you to rise into the truest, most powerful version of yourself. In this episode, Gervase shares the heart behind the podcast rebrand, what it means to be a “modern woman,” and how the Phoenix archetype offers a powerful guide for personal evolution.

Keep listening to hear how knowing and choosing yourself despite our social conditioning, trusting your inner wisdom, and making bold choices are key to becoming who you were meant to be.

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Why Permission is Where Healing Begins

On this week’s solo episode of the IAM podcast, Gervases seizes inspiration from a recent client interaction, discussing how patterns of disempowerment have left many women with the sneaky survival strategy of hyper-vigilance around the needs of others, and how permission, resource, and pleasure can allow us to bring more regulated versions of ourselves forward to meet life’s initiations. Listen in for questions that will help you begin to uncover what gives you life, what’s blocking you from your pleasure, and how you can accept permission to wake up and reclaim who you are instead of who you think everyone needs you to be.

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PANDAS: Biggest Lessons Learned One Year Later

This week on the IAM podcast, after a full year of navigating her daughter’s PANDAS diagnosis,Gervase shares her lived experience of integrating relationship, resource, pleasure, and advocacy into her approach to life and her daughter’s health. Listen in as Gervase discusses the importance of finding your “lighthouse” relationship in stressful times, how to choose your truth even when it goes against what everyone else is doing, the cyclical nature of life, and her personal journey with food and her family’s health.

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Break the Burnout Cycle

Join Gervase this week on the It’s All Me podcast as she shares how important the practice of resourcing has become in her life, especially in times of stress, like her recent bout with Covid during “Back to School’ season. Listen in as she shares why resourcing moment to moment is actually a regenerative practice that calms the nervous system, and how it differs from the typical American way of resourcing that leads to resentment and frustration. Keep listening to hear how this widely underestimated way of womaning allows you to be more efficient with your time and energy, so that you can feel better as you live, rather than collapsing in burnout and despair on your way to “better things.”

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Rejection is Redirection

Welcome back to a new season of the It’s All Me podcast! In this solo episode, Gervase shares her personal experiences of integrating a mindset that changed the trajectory of her life, and continues to help her along life’s more recent rejections. Listen in as G redefines rejection as an opportunity for redirection, discusses how we can keep the energy flowing in the face of failure or disappointment, and the power that lies in letting what is misaligned burn in the fire.

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Stop Trying to Fix Yourself; Your Body Has a Better Path

This week on the It’s All Me podcast, Gervase addresses the impact of going beyond the mind when it comes to healing. Listen in as she discusses the patterns that have led to a wave of traumatized nervous systems in modern society, and the risks we take when we focus on the problem rather than resourcing, regulation, and repair. Keep listening as G shares the power of somatic and subconscious healing when it comes to addressing trauma and breaking generational patterns, and the importance of approaching our healing journeys with compassion and curiosity.

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Burning it all down…again and again and again with Jeannine Yoder (Audience favorite)

This week on the It’s All Me podcast, we are bringing back a much-loved episode with Jeannine Yoder (Kochuba). In this episode, Gervase invites us to sit down with fellow AMDA graduate and New York Times Featured Feminine Leadership & Business Coach Jeannine Kochuba. Gervase and Jeannine share their journeys of becoming the women they are today by embracing and healing trauma, letting go of patriarchal and societal beliefs, and awakening to their power and purpose as women and mothers. Listen in and be part of a playful and deep conversation about how you are the woman you’ve been waiting for. That’s right - It’s All You.

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Challenge vs Suffering: Rewiring our Brains for Curiosity and Pleasure

This week on the IAM podcast, Gervase is dropping in with a solo episode on the difference between experiencing life’s challenges and allowing ourselves to sit in a state of suffering. Sharing her thoughts on the internalized systems that make suffering and martyrdom mindsets normal, Gervase also shares her own personal experience of addressing the blueprint of suffering within her own body and nervous system. Listen in as she shares how her training in Focalizing has helped her approach suffering in a more trauma-informed way, how we can make the shift to acknowledge challenges while not overidentifying with them, and the role that pleasure plays in the face of challenging times. Keep listening for an invitation to join G in her upcoming free masterclass on July 17th (link below!)

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How to Access More Pleasure as a High-Performing Woman

On this week’s solo episode of the I AM podcast, Gervase reminds high performing women - like you - of the transformative power of taking time to smell the metaphorical roses, and how it could actually be the most productive move you make in your entire life. Listen in as she shares what healing looks like when we pause and pendulate between the sympathetic and parasympathetic nervous system, discusses the challenges of slowing down in our speed-incentivized modern world, and how the practice of prioritizing your wellbeing and accessing pleasure can help you feel safe in your body, leading to a more resourced and productive life. If you’re ready to start embracing pleasure and self-discovery, while learning to regulate and resource your nervous system, listen in now! (and check out the upcoming masterclass below!)

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Partnerships the Phoenix Way: How to Cultivate Compassion, Agency, and Pleasure

On this solo episode of the It’s All Me podcast, Gervase shares her personal insights on partnership, co-creating safety and trust within your relationship to ask for what you need, and the importance of resourcing and living a life you love as individuals as well as a couple. She shares her personal journey of navigating a 14-year marriage through smooth sailing and rough waters, how she and her husband practice recognizing and letting go of victim-mentality behavior and taking radical self-responsibility, and how these practices cultivate more passion and pleasure in their relationship. If you’re feeling like you need support in your own relationship journey, keep listening for an invitation to walk the Phoenix path with Gervase, creating resources and safety within your own nervous system and within your relationships.

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The Path to Secure Attachment (Even If You're Anxious) with Carly Turner

This week on the IAM podcast, Gervase sits down with Carly Turner, certified CBT & Somatic Attachment Therapist, as they discuss anxious attachment, how it impacts all areas of life, and Carly’s personal path toward secure attachment. They dive into the possible roots of anxious attachment, and the importance of self-reflection, curiosity, and compassion along the journey to secure attachment. If you’re ready to stop being hijacked by your emotions and lost in the chaotic behavior that follows, listen for practices you can implement outside of triggered moments to cultivate more peace and trust within your system and relationships, as well as ways to ground and resource yourself in moments of triggering uncertainty.

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Joy is a Really Good Reason (Replay)

What is your relationship to joy? For a lot of modern women wearing multiple hats and feeling responsible for all sorts of projects and people, joy is the first thing they take off their list when life starts to feel too chaotic. On this episode of the It’s All Me podcast, Gervase talks about reconnecting to joy without the ‘shoulds’ and shame, why doing the work to get to joy is worth having tough conversations, and how joy can be a great motivator to lead the lives we desire. After all, joy is a really good reason to create and live a life we love.

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Pillow Talk: Reconnecting to Sensuality in Partnership with Sex Therapist Dr. Viviana

This week on the IAM podcast, Gervase reintroduces relationship and sex therapist Dr. Viviana, who shares how she uses her 20 years of experience to help couples cultivate an underlying current of sensuality in their relationships. Gervase and Dr. Viviana discuss ways to create a sexy environment outside of the bedroom, why some of us struggle with activating our sexuality, and how the right dance of sensuality and sexuality can create a long lasting sex life with our partners. Listen in to discover what is lurking behind the typical quantity and quality arguments between couples, Dr. Viviana’s secret to keeping the spark alive, and to hear a permission slip so liberating that it could change your ability to tap into your own current of sensuality.

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The Black Sheep's Journey: Understanding Generational Trauma with Nick Werber

This week on the podcast, Gervase introduces us to her mentor Nick Werber from the Focalizing Institute, as they discuss generational trauma patterns and how they can shape our childhood, adulthood, and even influence parenting practices. Nick shares specifically how family dynamics create outsider roles like the scapegoat and black sheep of the family and why we need these nonconformists. Listen in as Gervase and Nick share their personal experiences with these outsider roles, and how they and others who have been handed these (at times) trauma-fueled titles can utilize the practice of Focalizing to begin move the needle forward, redefine themselves from an internal place without needing external validation, and even make cycle-breaking a bit easier for the next generation.

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Creating Safety, Trust AND Boundaries with Your Kids with Destini Davis and Kiva Schuler

Join G and her guests Destini and Kiva this week on the IAM podcast as they have an in-depth discussion about peaceful parenting and the work necessary to make it a reality. Listen in as they discuss how the trending 'doormat’ version of peaceful parenting being highlighted on social media can actually be harmful to your child, why it’s vital to start with your own behavior and beliefs as a parent, and how you can create a bank of trust and openness with your child by avoiding overparenting. If you’re ready to carve a new path of parenting that creates safety, trust, and opens you and your child up for more resource, love, and true collaboration, listen in now!

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It’s Not Okay, And I’m Okay

In this week’s solo episode of the It’s All Me podcast, Gervase walks us through her lived experience of resourcing and holding space for the duality of being okay in the midst of chaos or stress without shame or blame. Listen in as she talks about acknowledging the range of your experience by feeling your feelings fully without judgment, why you don’t need to skip to the silver lining, and how to notice when you are gaslighting yourself. Keep listening to hear how to create safety within yourself, to resource and heal in community without putting the obligation on someone else, and how her trauma-informed practice of focalizing helps her and her clients heal themselves, their lineages, and honor all felt emotions - even when life is not okay.

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Self Regulation Is My Family's Way Of Life. Here's Why

On this week’s solo episode of the It’s All Me podcast, Gervase discusses how she reverse-engineered bad parenting advice and used it as inspiration for her family’s practice of self-regulation. Listen in as she shares how we can navigate the challenges and lies that we’ve been sold by modern Mother Culture, why it’s vital that you honor your own nervous system, and some tangible, practical ways she resources herself all day long (and how you can too!). If you’re ready to step out of reactionary, fight or flight parenting and start feeling resourced when the waves of life try to drag you under, to be the rock that your child can coregulate to, listen to this episode now.

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How to Ask For What You Want (at Home) Pt 2

In this second half of a two-part series, Gervase shines a light on how to get what you want at home. Using two highly common archetypes of women who aren’t currently getting their wants or needs met in the home, Gervase shares why this isn’t “just the way it is” and how you can take back your agency and embrace your power to evolve your life into a reflection of who you are on the inside. Listen in for the sneaky beliefs that are keeping you small, how accepting a life of not getting what you want can manifest into other symptoms in your life, why being needless and wantless is actually hurting your family, and so many more valuable insights (Seriously grab a pen). Keep listening for real-time practices of having grace for your current self and the shifts you can make to start getting what you want out of your home life.

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Understanding Childhood Trauma that Doesn’t Feel Like Trauma with Chelsea Green (Replay)

In this replay from 2021, Gervase is getting publicly therapized with soulmate and licensed professional counselor Chelsea Green. Chelsea speaks such wisdom about how the systems that we are surrounded by as children, translate into our adult life. The conversation is sprinkled with mic drop moment after mic drop moment from the choices that we face everyday to how we can calibrate our roles in the patriarchal society.

Chelsea is a Licensed Professional Counselor providing integrative mental health therapy in Charleston, SC. Her therapy practice specializes in working with adults, couples, and families in the midst of life transitions, relationship stress, trauma recovery, family systems, anxiety, depression, and stress. She is also a family constellation group facilitator and a visual artist who merges her many talents to curate transformative experiences.

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How to Ask For What You Want (at Work) Pt 1

In a masterclass-style solo episode this week, Gervase dives into how to ask for what you want at your place of work. Listen in as she discusses the three main beliefs of a high-performing woman who isn’t getting what she wants, the role of our sympathetic nervous system, the impact of the company you keep, what could be keeping you in a martyr mindset, and how to decipher if these beliefs are stemming from the culture of a toxic workplace or your own belief system. Keep listening for the action steps you can take to make the shift and start getting or creating what you want at work.

Catch part 2 in two weeks: How to get what you want at home

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