Why Women Don't Like to Cry (And Why You Should Start)
Have you ever been told that you’re too emotional? Or do you avoid crying at all costs because you don’t want to look weak? In this week’s episode, Gervase flips this narrative upside down, offering a powerful reframe that reveals why crying is actually a profound act of healing, as well as an opportunity for connection and growth. Listen in as she breaks down the societal indoctrinations and personal barriers that make us resistant to feeling our emotions, as well as the physiological and intuitive benefits of crying, making a case for why embracing your tears is a radical and necessary practice.
My mental health story & what therapy couldn’t “fix”
When it’s deeper than talk therapy, it needs a mind-body-soul approach. This week on the Modern Phoenix, Gervase shares insights from her mental health journey turned full-blown personal evolution. Listen in as she opens up about how transitioning from mind-based therapy to soul and body-centered practices like focalizing, somatic healing, and nervous system regulation opened new paths to healing and inner transformation. As she recounts pivotal moments that shaped her understanding of herself, she shares the profound power of trauma responses, intuition, inner child healing, and more, inviting you to look beyond conventional therapy practices and consider your own unique path to healing.
Matrescence: Does becoming a mother change… everything? with Jessie Harrold
The transition into motherhood reshapes not just our roles, but our very beings. In this episode, Gervase Kolmos sits down with Jessie Harrold, author of Mothershift, to explore the transformative journey known as matrescence. Jessie shares her insights on how becoming a mother can be both a radical shift and a rite of passage filled with growth, challenges, and deep self-discovery. Together, they discuss the complexities of identity shifts, societal expectations, and the importance of holding space for both the beauty and the struggle of parenting.
Keep listening as Gervase and Jessie cover the balance between rejecting and emulating our own upbringing, explore how motherhood pushes us to hold paradoxes and embrace nuance, and discuss how it transforms not only how we parent but also how we grow as individuals.
A Mind, Body, Soul Rest for 2025
Navigate the demands of the new year with greater ease, intention, and authenticity. In this week’s grounding episode, Gervase invites you to reflect, reset, and reconnect with the cycles of nature around (and within) you. She explores the effect of the Winter Solstice, our changing assignments for this season, and discusses how aligning with nature’s rhythm can help us navigate the demands of modern life with ease. Gervase shares her insights on living as a “modern woman on an ancient Earth,” and how tapping into the wisdom of your body and soul can unlock a new sense of clarity and coherence. Listen in as she guides you through a grounding exercise, sharing tools to help you slow down, refuel, and return to your life feeling aligned, resourced, and ready to create magic.
How my body helped me make up with my husband
What if the key to breaking through relationship conflicts isn’t in the talking but in the listening… to your body? In this episode, Gervase reveals how shifting from mind-based strategies to somatic and soul approaches (read: dropping out of the mind and into the body) transformed a weeks-long rupture in her marriage into a moment of deep connection and repair. Listen in as she shares her struggles with “circling the drain” with repetitive arguments, how the mind can get in the way of reconciliation, and the power of the body in moving through relationship stalemates. Keep listening for questions you can ask yourself to explore the practice of dropping into your body wisdom, and for a powerful reminder that healing doesn’t always come from trying harder but from thinking differently.
Breaking the Cycle of Fear-Based Parenting with Wendy Snyder
In this episode, Gervase shines a light on the pervasive belief: “I have to say or do the right thing, or they’ll be mad.” Gervase explores how this belief can not only trap you in cycles of self-doubt, stress, and rumination but also leads to self-abandonment. Join her as she shares insights into how the mind can mask trauma with obsession, frustration, and the relentless need to “get it right.” Keep listening to hear how you find the unique somatic soul strategy you need to bring yourself out of overwhelming obsession and into clarity, self-honoring, and groundedness.
I have to say the right thing or they’ll be mad
In this episode, Gervase shines a light on the pervasive belief: “I have to say or do the right thing, or they’ll be mad.” Gervase explores how this belief can not only trap you in cycles of self-doubt, stress, and rumination but also leads to self-abandonment. Join her as she shares insights into how the mind can mask trauma with obsession, frustration, and the relentless need to “get it right.” Keep listening to hear how you find the unique somatic soul strategy you need to bring yourself out of overwhelming obsession and into clarity, self-honoring, and groundedness.
It’s not okay for me to make mistakes
This week, Gervase takes on a limiting belief that surfaces in the lives of many modern women: it’s not okay to be wrong. Learn why this belief leads to fear, power struggles and a lack of authenticity in your life. You’ll discover why ruminating and gaslighting are trauma-based activation responses, and how leaning into body wisdom and the practice of resourcing can give you exactly what you need - the permission to be human, which will power a sense of ease, flow and creativity in your life.
Meet The Modern Phoenix
Welcome to the Modern Phoenix Podcast! Born from the ashes of the “It’s All Me” podcast, The Modern Phoenix is here to guide, inspire, and empower you to rise into the truest, most powerful version of yourself. In this episode, Gervase shares the heart behind the podcast rebrand, what it means to be a “modern woman,” and how the Phoenix archetype offers a powerful guide for personal evolution.
Keep listening to hear how knowing and choosing yourself despite our social conditioning, trusting your inner wisdom, and making bold choices are key to becoming who you were meant to be.
Why Permission is Where Healing Begins
On this week’s solo episode of the IAM podcast, Gervases seizes inspiration from a recent client interaction, discussing how patterns of disempowerment have left many women with the sneaky survival strategy of hyper-vigilance around the needs of others, and how permission, resource, and pleasure can allow us to bring more regulated versions of ourselves forward to meet life’s initiations. Listen in for questions that will help you begin to uncover what gives you life, what’s blocking you from your pleasure, and how you can accept permission to wake up and reclaim who you are instead of who you think everyone needs you to be.
PANDAS: Biggest Lessons Learned One Year Later
This week on the IAM podcast, after a full year of navigating her daughter’s PANDAS diagnosis,Gervase shares her lived experience of integrating relationship, resource, pleasure, and advocacy into her approach to life and her daughter’s health. Listen in as Gervase discusses the importance of finding your “lighthouse” relationship in stressful times, how to choose your truth even when it goes against what everyone else is doing, the cyclical nature of life, and her personal journey with food and her family’s health.
Break the Burnout Cycle
Join Gervase this week on the It’s All Me podcast as she shares how important the practice of resourcing has become in her life, especially in times of stress, like her recent bout with Covid during “Back to School’ season. Listen in as she shares why resourcing moment to moment is actually a regenerative practice that calms the nervous system, and how it differs from the typical American way of resourcing that leads to resentment and frustration. Keep listening to hear how this widely underestimated way of womaning allows you to be more efficient with your time and energy, so that you can feel better as you live, rather than collapsing in burnout and despair on your way to “better things.”
Rejection is Redirection
Welcome back to a new season of the It’s All Me podcast! In this solo episode, Gervase shares her personal experiences of integrating a mindset that changed the trajectory of her life, and continues to help her along life’s more recent rejections. Listen in as G redefines rejection as an opportunity for redirection, discusses how we can keep the energy flowing in the face of failure or disappointment, and the power that lies in letting what is misaligned burn in the fire.
Stop Trying to Fix Yourself; Your Body Has a Better Path
This week on the It’s All Me podcast, Gervase addresses the impact of going beyond the mind when it comes to healing. Listen in as she discusses the patterns that have led to a wave of traumatized nervous systems in modern society, and the risks we take when we focus on the problem rather than resourcing, regulation, and repair. Keep listening as G shares the power of somatic and subconscious healing when it comes to addressing trauma and breaking generational patterns, and the importance of approaching our healing journeys with compassion and curiosity.
Burning it all down…again and again and again with Jeannine Yoder (Audience favorite)
This week on the It’s All Me podcast, we are bringing back a much-loved episode with Jeannine Yoder (Kochuba). In this episode, Gervase invites us to sit down with fellow AMDA graduate and New York Times Featured Feminine Leadership & Business Coach Jeannine Kochuba. Gervase and Jeannine share their journeys of becoming the women they are today by embracing and healing trauma, letting go of patriarchal and societal beliefs, and awakening to their power and purpose as women and mothers. Listen in and be part of a playful and deep conversation about how you are the woman you’ve been waiting for. That’s right - It’s All You.
Challenge vs Suffering: Rewiring our Brains for Curiosity and Pleasure
This week on the IAM podcast, Gervase is dropping in with a solo episode on the difference between experiencing life’s challenges and allowing ourselves to sit in a state of suffering. Sharing her thoughts on the internalized systems that make suffering and martyrdom mindsets normal, Gervase also shares her own personal experience of addressing the blueprint of suffering within her own body and nervous system. Listen in as she shares how her training in Focalizing has helped her approach suffering in a more trauma-informed way, how we can make the shift to acknowledge challenges while not overidentifying with them, and the role that pleasure plays in the face of challenging times. Keep listening for an invitation to join G in her upcoming free masterclass on July 17th (link below!)
How to Access More Pleasure as a High-Performing Woman
On this week’s solo episode of the I AM podcast, Gervase reminds high performing women - like you - of the transformative power of taking time to smell the metaphorical roses, and how it could actually be the most productive move you make in your entire life. Listen in as she shares what healing looks like when we pause and pendulate between the sympathetic and parasympathetic nervous system, discusses the challenges of slowing down in our speed-incentivized modern world, and how the practice of prioritizing your wellbeing and accessing pleasure can help you feel safe in your body, leading to a more resourced and productive life. If you’re ready to start embracing pleasure and self-discovery, while learning to regulate and resource your nervous system, listen in now! (and check out the upcoming masterclass below!)
Partnerships the Phoenix Way: How to Cultivate Compassion, Agency, and Pleasure
On this solo episode of the It’s All Me podcast, Gervase shares her personal insights on partnership, co-creating safety and trust within your relationship to ask for what you need, and the importance of resourcing and living a life you love as individuals as well as a couple. She shares her personal journey of navigating a 14-year marriage through smooth sailing and rough waters, how she and her husband practice recognizing and letting go of victim-mentality behavior and taking radical self-responsibility, and how these practices cultivate more passion and pleasure in their relationship. If you’re feeling like you need support in your own relationship journey, keep listening for an invitation to walk the Phoenix path with Gervase, creating resources and safety within your own nervous system and within your relationships.
The Path to Secure Attachment (Even If You're Anxious) with Carly Turner
This week on the IAM podcast, Gervase sits down with Carly Turner, certified CBT & Somatic Attachment Therapist, as they discuss anxious attachment, how it impacts all areas of life, and Carly’s personal path toward secure attachment. They dive into the possible roots of anxious attachment, and the importance of self-reflection, curiosity, and compassion along the journey to secure attachment. If you’re ready to stop being hijacked by your emotions and lost in the chaotic behavior that follows, listen for practices you can implement outside of triggered moments to cultivate more peace and trust within your system and relationships, as well as ways to ground and resource yourself in moments of triggering uncertainty.
Joy is a Really Good Reason (Replay)
What is your relationship to joy? For a lot of modern women wearing multiple hats and feeling responsible for all sorts of projects and people, joy is the first thing they take off their list when life starts to feel too chaotic. On this episode of the It’s All Me podcast, Gervase talks about reconnecting to joy without the ‘shoulds’ and shame, why doing the work to get to joy is worth having tough conversations, and how joy can be a great motivator to lead the lives we desire. After all, joy is a really good reason to create and live a life we love.